Archive for the ‘NFP’ Category

HHS Mandate and Reflections

Sunday, February 26th, 2012

With regard to fighting the mandate, I agree that at one level the emphasis has to be on the First Amendment.  But I also think that we need to do what we can to point out that giving hormonal birth control is not good medicine. And we need to point out also that the claim to a right to free birth control is simply an outrageous example of the entitlement attitude that is sinking this country economically.

I think we need to recognize that this is in large part due to 43 years of ecclesiastical neglect of conscience formation regarding these issues.  I think it is entirely possible that Mr. Obama and Mrs. Sibelius have never met a fertile-age married person who actually believes and lives by what the Church teaches regarding marital love and sexuality.  (Okay, so they know Rick Santorum.)   But they are certainly aware of the statistics at the USCCB website that show that fertile-age Catholics are overwhelmingly in favor of the birth control practices they want to mandate.

Back in the Seventies or Eighties I was accused by a priest in another diocese of teaching against the bishops because I was critical of their still keeping archdissenter Fr. Charles Curran at CUA.  (Pope John Paul II finally forced his removal after 19 years.)

Sheila and I started an NFP course on February 8 at St. Lawrence parish here in Cincinnati.  I sent announcements to every parish in the city.  We had four registrations, all engaged couples at St. Lawrence, thanks to Father Watkins making the course a normal part of preparation for marriage.  At least 90% of fertile-age church-going Catholics are using unnatural forms of birth control; only 1.1% are using some form of systematic NFP.  This is well known.  The donation for our course is the cheapest in the area (half of what another teaching couple charges), so money can’t be the reason.

In NFPI we do not teach “Catholic birth control.  We try to teach generosity.  We promote and teach ecological breastfeeding, and where else are local engaged couples going to hear this today?  That alone should be sufficient reason for our priests to insist that their engaged couples take the NFPI course.

I certainly agree that we need to support our bishops in this battle against the HHS mandate.  While most fertile-age Catholics are already using unnatural forms of birth control, and while most Catholic doctors and medical practices are already doing what HHS wants, it is another thing entirely to be forced to do these things.

The time has come for our bishops, priests and deacons to realize that they can no longer ignore, for all practical purposes, the teaching of Humanae Vitae.  They need to provide practical motivation, and they need to realize that the practical and theological help we have been offering for 40 years (yes, 41 come this fall) is first rate even though dirt cheap.
_________________
A public response to John:

I completely agree with you, John! I was out in the schools–Catholic and public–teaching abstinence for 5 years. It was a hard road. I was involved in high school youth ministry at my parish for 17 years, mainly on the spiritual retreats. We mostly had the “cream of the crop”–those who wanted to get closer to God. Lots of them Catholic. They didn’t really want to hear the abstinence message either. Most of them didn’t understand why the boys had separate sleeping quarters from the girls and why one wasn’t allowed in the other’s sleeping area or why opposites weren’t allowed in each other’s sleeping bags! Girls “spooning” with guys was totally OK with them. Just look at how women–adolescents and on up–dress for Mass or better yet for their weddings!

I know from this experience, that abortion won’t end until modesty and morality return; and at this point, that has to start in the pulpit. It’s time for all religious–sisters, brothers, deacons, priests, etc–to stop worrying about offending their congregation and quake in their boots over the souls that are being lost to sin because of their sin of pride for the praise of men. If the world loves you, it is because it doesn’t love God. If you are going to stand in for Jesus–EXPECT TO NOT BE LIKED AND TO BE PERSECUTED FOR TELLING THE TRUTH!!!!!!!!!!!  It was hard for me, I didn’t like it. Lots of times I felt like Jeremiah, but I knew what I was responsible for and who I would be answering to if I didn’t tell them the truth.

Their outrage is 20 years too late. So I’m praying for the Bishops–mostly that God has mercy on their souls.
_______________

Other comments by John regarding the mandate.
“What editors and the readers need to see is that hormonal birth control is bad news because it increases the risks of several diseases–breast cancer included.  To foist this on unsuspecting teenagers is simply evil. ”

“I would add one more factor.  Regardless of the demerits or merits of any kind of birth control, the choice is a personal one.  Taxpayers should not be picking up the tab for personal choices which are essentially a matter of personal responsibility.  And I would say the same thing about Viagra-type drugs.  Reining in the cost of health care has to start someplace, and it seems to me that personal choice items simply have to go.”

For the dangers of taking the birth control pill, read the Lanfranchi and Brind online booklet on breast cancer at the NFPI website.

John F. Kippley
Battle-Scarred: Justice Can Be Elusive

NFP Home Study Course

Sunday, February 19th, 2012

The NFPI online natural family planning Home Study Course is one of the most complete and one of the least costly of the NFP programs.  A donation of $70 is requested for the entire course, and the couple taking the course can download one or two copies of the online NFPI manual, Natural Family Planning: The Complete Approach, for free.  If the engaged man and the woman live in different states, both may take the course. A certificate is given to married or engaged couples who complete the course.

This course follows the content in the NFPI manual.  It supports Church teaching on matters related to family planning and encourages couples to be generous in having children.  It teaches all the fertility signs and their rules and teaches God’s plan for spacing children through the right kind of breastfeeding.  Thus couples learn all their options.

What do the couples say who have taken the course?

“The online course has been very beneficial to me in more ways than I thought would be possible.  I definitely learned more about my religion and how the Church sees and feels about the marital act.  The course definitely has opened my eyes and reshaped and refocused my path to future family planning.  Thank you!”

“After taking this course, I have really learned a lot of things I did not know before.  For example, I learned that we are only fertile for a small window during the month.  I would definitely recommend NFP to anyone who wants to have children.  NFP has taught me a lot and I will benefit from NFP whenever the time comes for me and my future husband to start our family.”

“As a guy I have learned a lot of interesting things about a woman that I never knew about.  Overall, the book helped me to understand more the physical aspect of a woman and I have realized that there is a better and safer way of planning for a future family.”

Sheila Kippley
NFPI Home Study Course

Not Amorous During the Infertile Time

Sunday, January 22nd, 2012

My wonderful wife and I have three incredible children and we have been using the NFP method for about 7 or 8 years. Because of our age and our finances, we would prefer to be responsible, be thankful and are blessed to have the children God has given to us.

On a ‘personal’ note, because we want to be intimate during the non-fertile phase, we (well, I) find that my wife has far less interest in activity during that time, especially when her menstrual cycle is close. She becomes far more amorous during the times when she is  ovulating and we need to abstain.  We hold out on intercourse during the month and by the time we can share ourselves, the interest has waned because of natural causes.

Is this something you’ve discovered, heard about or experienced personally, and if so, what thoughts can you share. I’ve done a google search to no avail.

John:
Yes.  We have certainly heard of this, and it’s very understandable. The Lord made us this way.  In previous ages people had to work hard physically, and I imagine they got just as smelly as we do when we have a lot of physical exercise without any deodorants.  But the Lord wanted them to get together at the fertile time.  So he made woman in such a way that she feels more amorous at the fertile time, and some researchers think that her cervical mucus (or some other source) emits pheromes that are picked up by her husband’s olfactory senses that go beyond the simple sense of smelling something very obvious.  These pheromes make her more “attractive.”

I try to keep emphasizing that the marriage act is not just “having sex.” Animals “have sex.”  But only humans can come together to consciously celebrate their marriage in the marriage act.  The marriage act ought to be a renewal of the marriage covenant — the gift of self, the caring love, and the commitment of the marriage itself.

My suggested “remedy” for the situation you have discovered is for the spouses to try to recognize more deeply that the marriage act, like marriage itself, is not primarily for the self but for the other. Husbands with their typically much stronger drives toward sexual union can overlook this very easily because they can be satisfied at almost any time.  However, if a wife forgets this, she may have difficulty putting herself into it, so to speak.  On the other hand, if she can internalize that engaging in the marriage act during the infertile times when she feels less “sexy” is a great marriage act because it is a great gift of self, she may find great satisfaction, even if not exactly the same kind as she might have during the most fertile time, and sometimes even more satisfying as a renewal of their marriage covenant.  All one has to do is to reflect on some couple you know who have divorced, and that thought should make your own marriage act even more of an act of loving gratitude.

So, let an attitude of gratitude permeate your marital embraces.  Let me suggest that it may be helpful if each spouse, during those moments of silence is praying, “Thank you, Jesus, for my spouse.”

Another suggestion is to not watch any TV “shows” because it seems that they are so oriented toward stimulating lust within us.  I don’t say that on the basis of watching them but from the ads I see when I watch a sports event or from reviews I read.

I hope this hasn’t been too preachy but at least a little bit helpful.

In his service,
John F Kippley
NFP International
www.NFPandmore.org
Sex and the Marriage Covenant: A Basis for Morality (Ignatius)