The oneness of mother and baby is important for society.
How can we improve society? William Gairdner in his book, The War Against the Family, claims that there is unanimity on this important point: “poorly attached children are sociopaths in the making.” To avoid poorly attached children, the answer is good mothering. His key words for good mothering are these: availability, responsiveness, and sensitivity. Mr. Gairdner pointed out that three separate research studies conducted at three different major universities all clearly showed that what babies and young children need is l) mother’s availability, 2) mother’s sensitivity to her child’s signals, and 3) mother’s responsiveness to her child’s need for comfort and protection.4 In other words, the mother has to be there, she has to read the signals of her baby, and she has to respond to her baby in a sensitive manner.
Gairdner also states that “young children need an uninterrupted, intimate, and continuous connection with their mothers, especially in the very early months and years.” With prolonged breastfeeding, the mother does have an uninterrupted and continuous relationship with her baby, and it’s an intimate relationship as well.
Andrew Payton Thomas in his book, Crime and the Sacking of America, believes that one of the reasons the crime rates are soaring is because both parents are joining the workforce. “The rise of daycare in modern America says some painful things about us as parents and as a nation and culture, things that are easier for adults to leave unsaid. But the truth is always worth telling, and it is this: Many American parents today simply do not wish to raise their own children. Indeed, never before in history have a people become so intensely individualistic that their love for their children can be purchased so cheaply… Children are taught, literally from the cradle, that life is looking out for #1.”
Gerald Campbell, head of The Impact Group, claims that the #1 problem in our society is alienation, an emptiness, “an aloneness that cannot be tolerated by the human heart.” What people really need in his estimation is love, understanding, mercy and compassion, and commitment” from one person who learns to give of self “without any conditions or expectations whatsoever.” Campbell spoke of daycare as the ill of the future, and he stressed the value of a mother’s presence.
To prevent alienation in our society and to develop healthy individuals who feel loved and valued, good care by the mother for her child during the first three years of life is crucial. What is so important about breastfeeding is that it usually gives babies the best nurturing and the best nutrition. Prolonged lactation naturally provides those two realities that make such a positive difference!
1997 was a year of studies for the infant.
The United Nations General Assembly proclaimed 1979 as the International Year of the Child. Since these designations are made years in advance, there was ample time for research. Thus 1997 was a famous year for such publications. In the spring of 1997, new studies showed that “the neurological foundation for problem solving and reasoning are largely established by age one” and that the “number of words an infant hears each day from an attentive, engaged person is the single most important predictor of later intelligence, school success and social competence.” These studies stimulated new interest in the effects of nurturing and breast milk upon the brain. As a result, Newsweek published an entire issue on “the critical first three years of life.”
The main conclusion of the 1997 studies was that the number of words a baby hears during the first year of life must come from an “attentive, engaged human being.” Discussion centered on the importance of the parents’ role in the intellectual development of their child during the first three years of life and especially the first year of life when the infant’s brain is growing at a tremendous rate. By nature, that engaged, attentive person is the breastfeeding mother.
In the fall of 1997 there was another series of studies dealing with maternal deprivation. At the Society of Neuroscience meeting in New Orleans, it was reported that children need lots of hugs and physical reassurance for proper development of the brain. Romanian children raised without this physical contact from their mother had abnormally high levels of stress hormones. This parental neglect can have lifelong consequences. “Scientists have known for decades that maternal deprivation can mark children for life with serious behavioral problems, leaving them withdrawn, apathetic, slow to learn, and prone to chronic illness. Moreover, new animal research reveals that without the attention of a loving caregiver early in life, some of an infant’s brain cells simply commit suicide.” Does this apply to humans? Mark Smith, a psychologist at the DuPont Merck Research Labs in Wilmington, Delaware said: “These cells are committing suicide. Let this be a warning to us humans. The effects of maternal deprivation may be much more profound than we had imagined.”
How does stress affect the child’s brain? How does a mother’s presence protect or minimize the effects of stress upon her baby’s brain? During stress the body secretes large doses of cortisol to provide strength. However, cortisol can also shrink the hippocampus, the part of the brain responsible for learning, and can stunt the brain cells’ ability to communicate with each other by causing the connecting dendrites to atrophy. This helps to explain why cortisol is associated with severely delayed development. That’s the bad news. The good news is that the mother’s physical contact with her baby protects the baby against these harmful effects.
There are not many in Westernized cultures today who promote the importance of the mother being there for her baby during the early years. One does not want to offend the many mothers who seek fulfillment at the office or the classroom. In addition, many societies keep telling mothers that anyone can replace them. But that’s not true. A mother should be irreplaceable in the early life of a child. Today one hardly ever hears or reads what the experts and studies have shown, that it’s the concentrated interaction with one parent during the first three years of life that is so important. It’s because the baby is so important that the mother’s presence is so important. With prolonged lactation the mother can give many, many hours of nurturing during the crucial first three years.
Sheila Kippley
Next week: Natural child spacing and mother-baby inseparability